The show must go on
It always does.
July 19 came and went. 17 years ago my father died on this date. It took a long time,many years in fact, to get the thought from occupying every living moment. For years , even as I continued to function normally , in the background of my mind, the reel that was playing was all the times I had spent with him.
From my earliest memory of going to Gurney Drive and having an ice cream to accompanying him to his workplace to the years we were living in multiple towns and all the joy, laughter and bitter arguments we had to the last memory of saying a prayer beside his bed the day before his open heart surgery. This reel will play itself to the end and begin again in a continuous loop. While it didn’t affect my day to day life , I waited for the day when it doesn’t occupy every waking moment.
It took some years and eventually the reel slowed down to a couple of episodes a day. Even today it came and went a couple of times as I recollected some places and times from the past , and now after these many years , it does not occupy the main screen in my background mind’s theatre.
In all honesty, when the dead depart, as much as we want to feel and ongoing connection to them, we have to accept the fact that no amount of yearning will ever change the reality.
Everyone is free to believe whichever version of the “afterlife” story that they want. To each their own.
I have no intention to have a connection of sorts with the departed and whatever the journey may be ahead for them, I wish them peace.
You will never hear me saying “they are looking out for me” etc. The dead have done their part and paid their dues of a lifetime and I have no intention to “trouble” them to continue looking out for me. Haven’t they have done more than enough while still alive? Why bother them further with our troubles from this material world? Let them be peaceful in the afterlife- regardless what that is.
For the living, “the show must go on”. It always does.
